It's still very hard to be revised, to hear my writing work isn't quite there yet.

Why?

Because the way I was raised (why does everything hearken back to childhood), I had to work very hard to justify my existence on this earth. So unfortunately I'm still working through the sanctification process of that. I know I am more than what I do. I know Jesus loves me even if I sit in a chair and rest. But Somehow I equate my worth with what I produce. So when someone says "all is not well in your book," it takes me a while to recover.

Part of the reason I believe God has called me to write is to get through this. Suffering all that rejection as a writer has been a blessing for me because I've had to toughen. And, it's odd, but every book I've written has served to be one of God's tools to heal me. I don't find it a coincidence that the day I finished my third Defiance book (today, actually), my stepdad's wife passed away. I sense a connection between the two, and I hear God calling me to meditate as to how the two events (a finishing, a passing into heaven) coincide.

I'm like many of you. I put the letter away for a period of percolation, lick my wounds, and get at it. But the process, if I let it, is part of God showing me that it's okay not to be perfect, or produce everything right the first time. After all, He's not after my perfection. I remember Oswald Chamber's astute words: "I am called to live in perfect relation to God so that my life produces a longing after God in other lives, not admiration for myself . . . God is not after perfecting me to be a specimen in His showroom; He is getting me to the place where He can use me."

So perfection's overrated. It's about perfect relation to the One who spun the world into existence.

Mary DeMuth is an expert in the field of Pioneer Parenting. She helps Christian parents plow fresh spiritual ground, especially those seeking to break destructive family patterns.  She is also an accomplished author and speaker and has written several parenting books and speaks at retreats, seminars and conferences.  You can view her website at www.marydemuth.com